four

lena has been home almost four months.  she was was in the orphanage 4 years & she has only been home four months.  in so many ways it seems like she has always been here. 

december 17, 2011

only 4 months later, april 25, 2012

she is remarkable.  she continues to amaze us with how smart she is, with how much she is learning, with how opinionated she is, with how mysterious she can be, with big tears & with loud laughs.
a friend just last night saw her pick her own cup up at the table & start chugging down some apple juice all on her own & said "whoa, is that new right? isn't that amazing?"...yes, yes it is.
many folks have been asking us how she's doing.  "she's doing great" is my very honest & very generic answer.  it's a hard question to answer because i scaling how my children are doing is the path to crazy.  observing & discerning is wise but gauging can be dangerous.
is hazel good today?  is anders alright?  how is lena? am i doing enough? are they doing enough?
instead, i hope to wake up each day & think about how God has a great plan for each of their lives & rejoice that i get to be a part today.  oh Lord, may i only be a conduit of Your grace, love & Your growing these little ones.

with all that disclaimer, here is a lena 4 month update.  it is extensive because i want to remember... and anywhere that is says "we", i am talking about these incredible women & matt & i.

• isms::  many of lena's mannerisms are a product of her environment for the last 4 years.  little to no stimulation in a child causes them to find other ways to sort of "entertain" themselves.  lena's big thing is her eyes. she rubs & touches her eyes.  when she first got home we started to say "soft hands" & rub her hands to replace the action of her playing with her eyes with interaction with us.  now she is so familiar with this phrase, that we can mostly just say "soft hands" & she will stop by herself.  she also will stomp her feet & bang her hands.  she likes the sound & it is what she does when she is inward & to herself...which, is all she's known.  so, we are constantly attempting to draw her out, to interact & allow her to get comfortable with interacting.  days where she is more tired, this is more difficult.  but little by little, she will lock eyes, respond to us & engage us.  it's slow, but she is learning & i am so proud of her.  

• eating::   lena has had to learn to eat & drink from scratch.  before she was with us, she had all food & drink through a large metal spoon.  she was never taught how to close her lips around that spoon, so feeding time was not a time that she was actively involved in.  pretty much she just sat there & gravity mixed with a weak swallow got it all down & much of it would pour down her chin.  so, one of the first things the speech therapist started with was feeding & strength in her mouth.  lena started closing her lips around a sippy cup the second day she was with us & out of the orphanage.  then, few months ago, like right here, she started to hold & drink her from that cup.  at that time we had the stopper out of the sippy cups because she couldn't suck very well & now she has stoppers in all her cups!  she also started with closing her lips around a kid-size spoon.  it used to take anywhere from 30 to 45 minutes to feed lena a meal....teaching her (wrestling her) to open her mouth when we said "bite" & then she only ate (spit out) pureed consistencies.  now, we are at about 15-20 minutes a meal, which means she eats in about the same time frame as the rest of the family & she opens her mouth on her own when the spoon is close & doesn't spit food out & this is miraculous & this is wonderful in ways you just can't imagine unless you are me...feeding her 3 meals a day & 2 snacks a day. it is wonderful, wonderful! she's moved past pureed to thicker things & she'll eat pretty much anything we are eating, but just mashed up.  she loves peanut butter & jelly sandwiches (mashed up), macaroni & cheese (this doesn't have to be mashed at all...go lena!), cereal bars mashed with applesauce or mashed bananas, & mashed potatoes, & last night she had a huge helping of baked chicken cut up real small mixed with green beans, also cut very small.  most of the time she just rolls the food around in her mouth then swallows, but she has started to actively chew!  2 or 3 solid bites in a row.  

• talking::  lena &made some noises when we were with her in the orphanage & when we brought her home.  the most sounds she made at first were laughing when we tickled her:)  now, she makes babbling noises....mmmmm, du,du,du,du, ahhhhhh, lu,lu,lu.  however, the noises aren't near as exciting as seeing her purposefully communicate!  she can sign "yes" & "drink" & every now & then "all done" & "more" & "please".  she is learning to identify objects & is doing so great.  her speech therapist, amy, will hold a book & a toy she really wants & says to lena: "grab the book" (even though she really wants the toy") & lena will indeed grab the book.  she knows "book" & "ball" &...you ready for this modern gal..."mom's phone".  especially if classical music is playing.  they are working on commands like "put in" & "take out" using toys & a bucket.  we say "turn page" when reading her a book & she does it probably 70% of the time & are just starting "no".  and my personal favorite has started regularly happening in the last 2 weeks.  i'll get close to her face & say "kiss momma" & sure enough, she'll pucker & lean her head close to kiss me.  there are no words for how great this is.  now, she doesn't do all these things 100% of the time.  

• walking::  lena's physical therapist is constantly working on strength, balance, and much much more.  they are doing side stepping, where she'll stand holding onto her crib & step side to side.  we're also working on transitions...going from laying down to standing in a way that is lena doing it instead of me just lifting her.  her physical therapist & occupational therapist work on her in a crawl position & for the longest time if she got in a crawl position, it was too uncomfortable to her & her arms were too weak so she would duck her head & just collapse her arms.  now she will definitely stay in that crawl position & she even started rocking in it...like wanting to crawl:) and then there is lena in her walker.  she's a stud (when she wants to be:))...if she doesn't feel like walking then she just stops & slumps down.  but, if she does feel like walking, she rocks it out!!! like this:

• seeing::  we have visited an eye doctor in st louis twice that is helping us with lena's vision.  her eyes point outward, causing her to see 2 seperate images, instead of focusing on anything in particular.  she will have surgery to try to correct this or make it as close to correct as they can get.  she is also nearsited & we fitted her for glasses the other day.  these are just for sizing & they are blue, but hers will be grey.  

how cute is that?  she's so hipster.

• playing::  occupational therapy does a lot of teaching lena to play.  her hands weren't strong enough to hold a toy when she first got home, which makes it hard to hold & play.  her hands & arms are still very weak & this will be a long process.  she would throw, throw, throw everything you tried to get her to play with.  she still does.  i just picked my phone up off the floor.  however, i remember giving her the toy back over & over & over.  then just yesterday, she sat cross-legged on the carpet.  very upright & played with a toy that makes music & lights up (her favorite!).  i expected to go back & forth many times & then realized it had been 15 minutes & she had not thrown the toy!  this is amazing.  now, i'm going to pick my phone up off the floor again.  one of her occupational therapy sessions is up at the clinic & they have a sensory room.  it's dark & quiet with really cool lights & colors & soft textures & it is the epitome of lena's happy place.  she LOVES it!! 

here she is with abby.  not long after this picture was taken, she was smashing her nose against that tube of lights & bubbles:)

• sleeping::  for most of her life, lena was laying down.  5 years of this can make learning a normal sleep cycle very difficult.  days when lena has slept well the night before are really uneventful, great days.  but about 3 nights a week she wakes up in the middle of the night & doesn't know how to get back to sleep.  she turns her head from side to side or kicks her legs.  last night she did this from about 1 to 2:30am.  some days she'll get up at 3am & be up...for the day.  it is getting better & better but the days where she hasn't slept will be more difficult days...meaning she cries very easily because she's so tired & if you've seen lena cry then you know it's very sad.  i now know she is just tired because she doesn't do this when she has slept.  it has taken about all of the last 4 months to learn this:)  but, we are getting there & now there are more nights in a week that she sleeps than she doesn't & we are thankful for that.

• stuff::

the equipment fellas from action seating & mobility came to the house a few weeks ago & fitted lena for all new equipment that will be just for her size, needs, etc.  the picture above is of mike...he went on the TEAMworks trip in october & actually met lena in ukraine, so it was amazing to have him in our home with her HERE!  we have some hand-me-downs that are working great for now & they helped me learn more about our existing equipment.  it was exciting to talk about our house & lena & figure out the perfect things for her needs.  we ordered a new stander, wheelchair (that she may be able to eventually propel herself) & walker.