lena louise mooney,
the other day you turned 7. a few nights ago, night we went around the dinner table and said the things we love about you. your mom, your dad, you brother, your sister...your family, your God-ordained forever family. we all could've gone round and round. you smiled and signed "eat", as if to say "i appreciate the sappy stuff, but i'd like to finish dinner".
and i love that about you.
i woke you singing the happy birthday song in your ear and you smiled and made your "ahhhh" noise. i smiled back, tickled you a little, then a few tears. tears of the pure joy and full heart of a grateful mom...and tears from that strange place of being your mom on a day that i wasn't there when you were born.
there were 5 birthdays, i wasn't with you. and now there has been 2 that i have been with you and i love that there will be day where the ones we have been together far outnumber those 5.
i am so proud of you, dear lena. pardon my language, but you are a real little badass, you know that? this is a hard thing to explain to folks who may see you as weak or fragile, but you and me, we know it don't you. you are a real spitfire, you are strong inside and out and full of fun and smiles. you get blazing mad and you laugh loud and when you wanna be, you are strong as an ox.
you sat in my lap in church the other night and i rocked you back and forth to the music. a choir sang out hallelujah ...and i sat in awe, i think i stopped breathing for a second at the holiness of the moment. a broken little girl held by a broken momma....both so desperate for Jesus, the One source of true hope and life, the Light of the world, Who truly does put pieces of us back together.
dear sweet daughter, happy 7th birthday. almost happy 2 years home with your forever family. when i look at you, at the narrative God has written and is writing for your life, i see the real and inexplicable love of the Father. i am constantly at a loss for words that express the beauty of the gospel i see in your story...and not just the big picture of you being far off, and alone and then coming close and having a family...but so much more. the day-to-day, moment-by-difficult and wonderful-moment lessons you keep teaching me.
no words, so i just keep looking at pictures.
and i love that about you.
i woke you singing the happy birthday song in your ear and you smiled and made your "ahhhh" noise. i smiled back, tickled you a little, then a few tears. tears of the pure joy and full heart of a grateful mom...and tears from that strange place of being your mom on a day that i wasn't there when you were born.
there were 5 birthdays, i wasn't with you. and now there has been 2 that i have been with you and i love that there will be day where the ones we have been together far outnumber those 5.
i am so proud of you, dear lena. pardon my language, but you are a real little badass, you know that? this is a hard thing to explain to folks who may see you as weak or fragile, but you and me, we know it don't you. you are a real spitfire, you are strong inside and out and full of fun and smiles. you get blazing mad and you laugh loud and when you wanna be, you are strong as an ox.
you sat in my lap in church the other night and i rocked you back and forth to the music. a choir sang out hallelujah ...and i sat in awe, i think i stopped breathing for a second at the holiness of the moment. a broken little girl held by a broken momma....both so desperate for Jesus, the One source of true hope and life, the Light of the world, Who truly does put pieces of us back together.
dear sweet daughter, happy 7th birthday. almost happy 2 years home with your forever family. when i look at you, at the narrative God has written and is writing for your life, i see the real and inexplicable love of the Father. i am constantly at a loss for words that express the beauty of the gospel i see in your story...and not just the big picture of you being far off, and alone and then coming close and having a family...but so much more. the day-to-day, moment-by-difficult and wonderful-moment lessons you keep teaching me.
no words, so i just keep looking at pictures.
Love.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful, Oh, so beautiful. . . in oh, so many ways.
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